SOMEBODY COME GET ERRRR, SHE DANCING LIKE A STRIPPPERRR! Ahhh, I cannot tell you how long I’ve wanted/needed to get that reference into a blog post, but now here we are in a bunch of beautiful bodysuits for my latest collaboration with Femme Luxe Finery! They're an online store that's extreeeemely Kardashian-esque and I seem to have made it my mission to put my 5'2" flat-chested body into all their garms to prove you don't have to look like a hyper-feminine cartoon character to look good in their bits. How am I doing, lol?
I’ve never really had bodysuits on my radar, but after a few of my favourite instagrammers have started using them as the new ‘jeans and a nice top’, I’d be silly not to jump on the hype. But isn’t it also just lush to have a few pretty pieces of lingerie to eat Haagen Dazs and watch CBS Reality in during lockdown? *Hint* The answer is always yes.
★★★★★
How bloody nice is this?! A black lace bodysuit is always a classic; it’ll go with anything and looks amazing by itself. I just absolutely love the cut of this bodysuit. The hourglass-shaped paneling through the middle tricks the eye and gives a beautifully-shaped waist. I also adore the lace around the cut of the legs, making it look super feminine and sexy.
The cups [my area of stress, being a meagre 32A cup] actually fit perfectly! I chose a size S 8-10, and luckily there’s no gaps or extra loose material that my boobs should fill. It does make me question where on earth a boob might go, if you have them, so it may be worth sizing up in you’re well-endowed in that area. I styled these with some Adidas leggings for a casual slobbing-about lewk, but once the world reopens I’m thinking wet-look leggings and over-the-knee boots for a saucy lady of the night situation.
★★★★☆
Hello beauty! Check out this little number! I really really love anything white at the moment. I’m tanned for the first time in aaaages, and throwing on a mainly white outfit really accentuates this. I quite enjoy the more unusual fishnet/mesh style of lace on this bodysuit, and I love love love the floral panel through the centre and the A-Line band under the bust to add shape.
These bodysuits all have a handy popper in the crotch for inebriated wees in bars [these are impossible to do up whether you’re slaughtered or not, in my opinion] however I’ve got a feeling that they’re all pretty VPL-y. My only gripe about this one would be the cups. It’s described as half-cup, and they kind of give me a weirdly shaped boob. But I don’t think it’s too damning - with a pair of blue jeans I think this bodysuit is so cute for daytime/lunch date wear. I definitely need to invest in some nipple covers though!
★★★★★
I loved the look of the black ‘Dove’ bodysuit so much that I decided to get it in red, too! I’m terminally afraid of colour and so I generally only wear black, white and greys. This is partly due to always having my pink hair so wanting to avoid a clash, but also because I think coloured clothing can look super tacky on me for some reason! But I pulled a YOLO and added this to my cart. Red screams sexy to me, and again, I think this accentuates my tan and is just so girly, minxy and gives me serious “what?-my-third-husband-has-mysteriously-vanished?” vibes.
Same with the black version, the paneling and lace detail through the centre of the bodysuit create a beautiful hourglass shape. The cups are perfectly sized [although I did nearly rip out a nipple bar when trying this one on!]. I styled this with black jeans for the outside outfit, but I can’t say I’m convinced. Maybe blue denim would look better, back to the drawing board!
★★★★☆
The epitome of stripper realness! I really really love these caged bodysuits, however I’m forced to knock a point off because the bra-area is slightly too big! I knew this would happen on one of the bodysuits but I’m quite vexed it’s this one. However, I feel like I can still get away with it as long as I do minimal arm-movements and absolutely zero leaning over. The cage detailing is serving absolute dominatrix and I also really like the more delicate lace on the cups, which kind of balances it out.
The sectioning of the body is cute; I like the lace on the hips and the very fine, sheer mesh of the centre which shows off my tattoos - and the reaper is on full show! This definitely isn’t one for daytime wear - it’s going to remain in the wardrobe until I can schedule in a night in da club with my girls who, no doubt, will be wearing even less than me. Because the sizing feels slightly larger, i’s super comfy though, probably the most comfortable and most soft out of the lot! I’ve thoroughly enjoyed lounging around in this and my joggers for an easy lockdown lewwwwk.
A big big big thank-you to Femme Luxe Finery for yet another collaboration! I know I say this every blinking time, but this is probably my favourite one yet. I cannot wait for the world to reopen so I can put these to good use. Jasmine McRae’s bodysuits, coming to a bottomless brunch near you!
Lots of love,
Jasmine x
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